Why I Hate The Royal Wedding

As William and Catherine get set to take the plunge, I’m ready to wretch for the umpteenth time. Why? The Royal Wedding emphasizes everything that’s wrong about marriage.

Now before you get your knickers all in a bunch and have the Queen Mum send me a strongly worded letter, I’d like to say that I hold no disdain for Prince William and his bride-to-be personally. I wish them well in their marriage. I believe that they are truly in love and that they are attempting to brush off much of the pomp and circumstance in favor of a more personal and less ceremonial wedding.

Unfortunately, the public and the Brits themselves ain’t buying it.

My wife just uttered as I type, “I can’t wait to see what her dress looks like!” OK, I’ll admit a but of curiosity here too, but my friend Hope is getting married in the fall and I’m far more interested in seeing what her dress looks like. Why does this couple attract so much attention? It’s all because of the dangerous myth that marriage solves all the problems of a young girl. It’s the fairy tale of the “commoner” finding her prince. And isn’t she lucky to have married so “well”?

Horse feathers.

When Charles and Diana married we heard the same old story and let’s not forget how that fairy tale ended. I’m praying that William is more dedicated to his wife than his father was to his mother. But back to the fairy tale notions.

Marriage is not something that solves all your problems. In fact, oftentimes marriage gives you twice as many problems than you had before. You inherit your spouses problems along with your own. What’s beautiful about marriage is that you have two people who commit their lives to overcoming those problems together. That commitment and that commitment alone leads to happiness that is centered in love.

Catherine Middleton will certainly have many advantages in marrying Prince William. The photographer Mario Testino who photographed Princess Di on numerous occasions has taken Cate under his wing already, as she wishes to become a professional photographer. How many would-be shutterbugs would long for that position. Testino doesn’t even know if she has any promise, I would gather. But again, it’s not what you know, but rather WHO you know.

And so we’re back to square one where the media only cares about the elite and perpetuates the myth that this is the marriage that all women should long for.

Folks, let me tell you one thing. Marriage is more than a froofy dress and Buckingham Place. Young William has already stepped out on Ms. Middleton once and she promptly dumped his royal behind for doing so. I hope his commitment lasts this time long after the TV crews, cameras and Elton John goes away.

We care about the Royals because we cling to the myth that this is a better life instead of making the best we have of our own. Are all marriages inferior to this spectacle?

So married, engaged and couples of today:

In my best snooty British Accent:

I implore you, to boycott watching the Royal Wedding and instead spend that time with the one you love, reveling in who you are and not who everyone thinks you should want to be. Furthermore, may your love be a greater sign of God’s love for each one of us, not in some kind of fairy tale way, but in a way that expresses God’s love for all of us. After all, love is deeper than money or class, it goes beyond riches or poverty and instead calls to each one of us to be committed to those we care about. It is that commitment that leads us to know God more deeply as the one who remains committed to us always. And so I humbly declare that this day may be one of great rejoicing for all committed couples and I ask that you recommit yourselves to each other again today.

I’m off to plan a nice breakfast for my wife. But most likely she’ll want to watch the damn wedding.

I leave you with this bit that Time Magazine writes “is all you need to know about the Monarchy.”

Love this. I just might watch this instead of the wedding.

Join the Conversation

3 Comments

  1. I’ll try to send you a pic of my dress ;-).

    Bill and I saw Spamalot when it was in Rapid City (his Christmas gift). This scene is in the show.

    With regard to marriage, I am already learning that it is no easy task. Sometimes it is a fight trying to insist in my professional life that I must have the opportunity to spend quality time with my fiance. Thanks for the reminder that that is not a ridiculous but a reasonable thing.

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  2. I am an Indian student studying in London. I can say that I am actually at the wrong place at the wrong time. The whole city has gone gaga over the wedding. The madness began ever since the couple announced their engagement in November 2010. The souvenirs are crazy. Tomorrow is a national holiday. As an outsider, I don’t care about the wedding but the English consider the British monarch as their cultural symbol and a very important part of their heritage.

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  3. I did watch the Royal wedding and I fell asleep during the sermon. Very exciting! I just wanted to see the dress! I did watch that clip you put up and it was hysterical! Way better than the sermon!

    Personally, I agree with my husband. I want to see Hope’s wedding. It will be the wedding of the year! I can’t wait to see Hope’s dress and how stunning it looks.

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