One of the central tenets of the Catholic Charities Volunteer year is to stay open. It’s not like an all night diner or anything, it’s more about opening your heart to God, possibilities, the poor, community and more.
I’ve learned a lot from these 8 people who I’ve spent a good portion of the this year. There’s Anna, who is probably the sweetest person I have ever met who always reminds me that I need to be patient and stay open to the spirit and eventually we’ll begin to notice that things are often more similar than different. People who we think are different become more like us the more we strive to stay open to learning about them–those close to us as well as those we may serve in food pantries, homeless shelters, schools and even in our communities.
There’s Ian, who reminds me to be open to humor and seeing the lighter side of things, while at the same time, not taking things so lightly that we stop being concerned about those who are oppressed and vulnerable or simply different from ourselves.
Helen gives me an opportunity to remind myself that as a man, I need to be an example of someone who treats women with the respect that they are due. That I don’t fall into old stereotypes or misogyny. She too has a flair for smiling and laughing often, reminding me that life indeed can be joyful. She also has a heart for those who are left out, staying open to relationship when she’s an outsider and striving to stay open when she feels like outsiding someone else.
Nick gives me an opportunity to learn and to be challenged by new ideas and experiences. He’s unafraid to try things that are new and sometimes even uncomfortable. On retreat he went to the Abbey at 2AM to pray with the monks with some other folks. The service was entirely done in chant. When he came outside he intoned in full chant cadence:
“Well, that was ve-ry innnnn-terest-inggggg. (pause) I’m not sure if I will ev-er go a-againnnnnn.”
I cried laughing and giggled every time I remembered that. A dry wit to be sure, Nick gives me that courage to try something new and that if I don’t like it, it’s not the end of the world and moreover, even if I’m uncomfortable for a bit, well, staying open means that we are continually waiting for possibilities to show themselves to us.
These four have made up the house that Marion and I have been a support couple for. The second house feels a lot similar and I think we’ve been their honorary support couple as well.
Leigh keeps reminding me to be a be accepting of new friends and to always make sure that I consider “the other.” She’s a prayerful person and is unafraid of being one openly, reading books on prayer in coffee shops and inviting new friends to church. She’s driven to succeed and at the same time is always mindful of “home.” Her Louisiana heart often harkens back to Baton Rouge and reminds me not to forget where I come from.
Mary gives me those moments of laugh out loud glory. Critical and sarcastic (in a good way), Mary is studious but not bookish, if that makes sense. She knows how to have a good time, but is never superficial. She can make fun of the vampire book phenomenon just as much as a Kafka novel, critically assessing both in ways that make me laugh, think and appreciate her praises and challenges. And she’s just as tough on herself as she is on others as a writer. She’ll keep readers a lot more entertained than I do.
Margaret is a special woman who gives to children as an aunt, never spending too much time away from her nephews. She also appreciates childhood, allowing herself to be silly and also amazed by new and joyful experiences. She is a great community member, opening her heart to others and letting others touch her heart and to be open to change. She speaks her truth and owns it well, reminding me to speak my own mind and not to worry about what others think. And a big gift she gives is that she shows gratitude openly to others, especially when they have touched her heart.
Lastly, Cameron is the man. He’s someone with a true heart for service and for others and he challenges me to be that open. He embraces the vulnerable and always introduces himself to the poor, unmasking the veil that separates the haves from the have nots. He realizes that he is not all that different from the poor, from his housemates, from the stranger. He allows the world and the systems we often are apathetic about to frustrate him and it motivates him to action, but not before opening his mind and heart further to think about what would really be the best plan. He is a mix of simplicity and complications at the same time and I am better for having met him.
It is these people who have reminded me this year that God just might have something more to offer if we are open enough to remain with God on the journey, to be open to what God may offer us, even if it’s not what we wanted or expected. Sometimes the world does not revolve around us, instead we need to be open to reacting to the world as God would hope we would.
As Lent approaches, I hope I can be open enough to clean out what gets in my way, so that I can see what brings me lasting joy.
A special thanks to Amy Vossen Vukelic who asked Marion and I to be support people this year for the Corps and to Donna and Lydia who also help us support the team.